First of all let me say I am very sad and sorry that you have been hurt. Please forgive me if I have ever hurt you. You are a child of God and therefore are deserving of respect and love.
As a Christian I want to say that I have been ashamed of the words and actions of my brothers and sisters as well. They are a sometimes difficult bunch, but so are the people I have met who don’t profess Christ. So I just try to treat them all the way Jesus did, love and forgive, and move on.
I hear your cry for love. You see it in certain Scriptures. Paul did write those beautiful words in Corinthians and Jesus was motivated by love but his mission in life was not just to be an example or to spread love. His purpose was to be the Messiah.
In Matthew, Chapter 16: 13-17 Jesus wanted to make sure his disciples knew who he was:“When they came to the area of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his followers, "Who do people say the Son of Man is?" … Simon Peter answered, "You are the Christ, the Son of the living God." Jesus answered, "You are blessed, Simon son of Jonah, because no person taught you that. My Father in heaven showed you who I am."
Again “Then they all said, ‘Are You then the Son of God?’ So He said to them, ‘You rightly say that I am’” (Luke 22:70).
“I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father but by me” (John 14:6).
He knew and taught who he was, not just another teacher or good man, but the Messiah, the Annointed One who came to offer reconciliation between God and all people. Why did we need that reconciliation?
"For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God" (Romans ).
The word “sin” is used in a lot of ways, but the essential meaning and result of sin is separation from God, it involves pride -- man thinking more highly of his own ways than God’s. Without Jesus Christ, His sacrifice and resurrection, connecting to God is not possible because of sin. We all have sinned, the results of which are death and an eternity separated from God. Since God is Holy, there can be no imperfection in His presence.
But death was not God’s plan for us. Abundant and eternal life is what Jesus Christ came to bring.
Why? Romans 5:8 says, "But God showed His great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners."
You wrote that you believe in Jesus. But what does that mean?
Do you believe parts like Mr. Jefferson and the bible he made by cutting out pieces of the Scripture and pasting them together?
Because to Jesus the only belief that mattered was belief in his ability to be the Savior.
In John 11: 25-27 “Jesus said to her, "I am the resurrection and the life. He who believes in me will live, even though he dies; and whoever lives and believes in me will never die. Do you believe this?" "Yes, Lord," she told him, "I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, who was to come into the world."
I guess the upshot is the only thing that mattered to Jesus is that his sacrifice not be in vain. I am sure he is flattered that so many people like him and his teachings, but I think the purpose of his life was the atonement he offered for us, or the satisfaction he gained through his death.
I found this interesting from
Christ's work consisted of suffering and obedience,
and these were vicarious, i.e., were not merely for our benefit, but were in our stead,
as the suffering and obedience of our vicar, or substitute.
Our guilt is expiated by the punishment which our vicar bore,
and thus God is rendered propitious, i.e.,
it is now consistent with his justice to manifest his love
He who was guilt free stood before the judge and took our sentence: Death.
That means the most important thing in your life and mine is what we do with Jesus. No matter how many places we look and see hurt in the church that does not negate the fact that an innocent man loved you enough to cross death and hell to say I love you and I want to spend eternity with you.
Not many people can get past what his “followers” have done to what Jesus actually says. It is mostly and importantly about a relationship with Jesus. The others are secondary, albeit quite distracting and hurtful.
And please, please know I am not belittling your hurt. But just like in a romantic relationship you cannot let one jerk keep you from ever loving anyone else again.
The Shepherd of your soul is calling. He wants to patch your wounds and restore you to a place of peace and comfort.
I hope this is encouraging to you dear one, I do still pray for you.
You are very precious to your Heavenly Father and He thinks of you often, catching your tears in a bottle. (Ps. 56:8)
With all my Love